3/4 of a 6" flatbread sandwich from subway. 200cals? 250?

Spent 2-3 hours walking around a museum. I looked up how much you burn walking, and for 2-3 hours it was in the 600cal range which seems like a lot. I'm going to say 300. I'm totally exhausted, that's what museums do to you, but I don't think I walked off 600 Cals. Who knows though.

I'm getting a taco right now to help me focus to do work, and that's it.

Hope you all are doing well! I'll update stats and all tomorrow morning! <3

Today's allowed calories : 500

Breakfast: 0
Exercise: -300
Lunch: 260

I'm going to avoid dinner if possible. Or keep it very small. Tomorrow I'm going out to dinner so I'm saving my cals for then.

Todays intake:
redbull 160 (but didnt finish it. drank 1/3 so more like 100 ish)
1/4 sandwich that was gross- 100
1/2 sandwich- 200? 300?
sprite

Today I lost 1 pound.

breakfast - 1/2 cup dry cereal - 80cals
5 mi hike- -800 cals?
Lunch- 1/2 sandwich 300 cals?
Dinner- nothing 0 cals

Net: -420 !! Love being in the negative cals again. Im gonna be sore tomorrow but it will feel so good!

about to go on a hike, burn some calories and get out of the house.
Thought id check in real quick though.

yesterdays intake:
breakfast: 1 babybel cheese. (70 cal)
Lunch: nothing (0 cals)
Dinner: 1/2 burger (300-400?)

so far,
Today:
breakfast: 1/2 cup dry cereal. (80 cal)

today-
exercise this morning: -300 cals ?

intake:
chips
open faced sandwich
cashew squares.

Also, I wish i had a million dollars because im too excited for winter and want all these clothes!

Thinspo

Calla Lily,
Im jealous ! I wish i was more toned, but like i said in my previous posts- i dont have access to a gym anymore, and i hate running! although i wish i liked it.. I ride horses everyday. or at least i did when i wasnt in school. But my body is the tall/naturally lean type.
Here is some documentation from awhile ago. I fluctuate around this area usually. sometimes thinner, sometimes thicker.
trying to get thinner. obviously...
I use to go to the gym a lot and do cardio and also see a personal trainer for weights, so i use to be much more toned, but i moved so i dont get to do that anymore unfortunately.

stats

the lovely Calla Lily asked for my stats, so here you go :)

5'10"
last time i weighed i was about 127lbs-130lbs (trying to get to 110).
b- 32"
w- 26"
h- 37"

anything else youd like to know that i left out ??

3:24

The last few days Ive been doing so well with not eating throughout the day.... until it hits nighttime.

Thursday- no food all day. 1 sl pizza at 8.
Friday- no food all day. 2 tacos at 6:30
Saturday- a raw kale salad for lunch. and then a cup of pasta and a little bit of chili for dinner.

Being back in school has helped a lot. It keeps me busy, distracted, and stuck in rooms where I cant get up and grad snacks anytime i want. I just need to figure out how to keep from diving into food at the end of the day.
I think i fool myself. Because I was eating "healthily" prior to this, that i convince myself i should be able to eat every night since i didnt eat anything all day. like a reward, but in reality, im just ruining any progress i could have made that day.

I can see some things changing though.
My knees are a bit more knobby.
I can see the muscle definition starting to surface beneath the fat on my thighs.
When i put my hands on my waist, my ribcage is beginning to feel narrower again.
Theyre small changes, nothing dramatic or exciting yet, but its progress.
I still feel like fatty, and soft, and just an "average" looking girl.
I miss the frailty.

Also,
in one of my classes, one person was making work all about body and self image, it had works about cutting, and what i automatically perceived as an ED. whether thats my own mind interpreting it because its on my mind, or because it was about it. Which i totally think it was. I made the mistake once about making work about this. I dont think i ever could again. The whole school was murmuring about me and this project.

Craving Fall

Fall and Winter is when I feel my restricting creep in the hardest. I can curl up in a blanket, drink something warm, and enjoy the constant patter of rain and the overcast skies. 

Although I live in LA, where its almost never "winter." its still about 100 degrees outside and my soul is aching for fall. for winter. for rain. for fog. for cold. and empty. and big sweaters. and layers. and boots. with socks. sunken cheeks. and fragile wrists. 

I wait, anxiously